Home FROM the Holidays!

Travel is exhausting!  Fun, but it wears you out.   We had a wonderful visit with my mom.  We had everyone in our family at Christmas in California (except for Jon and Chelsea) and it was great!  We have several family traditions that just begin as a one time occurrence.  Then they are continued the next year until they are part of the whole experience. A new one that I "vote" to be a tradition is the brisket that Christy and Don made the last 2 years for our "big" dinner.  It is from Don's Aunt's recipe and it is a winner! 


My eating is getting better all the time now.  I still have some challenges, and some episodes that pass a little more quickly than before. The great news is that I have lost 6 more pounds since I last posted!  A total of 37 now.  I am finding that it is easy to eat the "wrong" things because they are easier or quicker or taste good and don't hurt, but are not what I need to be eating.  I need to focus on protein and exercise. 


We have enjoyed many blessings and a few Christmas miracles when it came to our travels.  God is so good and we are so unworthy.  

¹¹ Lord, you are great and powerful. 

       You have glory, victory, and honor. 

       Everything in heaven and on earth belongs to you. 

    The kingdom belongs to you, Lord; 

       you are the ruler over everything.

 ¹² Riches and honor come from you. 

       You rule everything. 

    You have the power and strength 

       to make anyone great and strong.

 ¹³ Now, our God, we thank you 

       and praise your glorious name.

1 Chronicles 29:11-13

(New Century Version) 

3 more days

The word is "survive" - - - the last 3 days before Christmas break. The only other time for "survival" in schools is the first week, and the last week. :)

Chelsea's mom

Update on Janna: She is improving. She is at home with nursing care. They are looking for a doctor in the states to treat her.

One more pound = yay!

Blessings: Numbers 6:24-26

²⁴ “The LORD bless you

and keep you;
²⁵ the LORD make his face shine on you
and be gracious to you;
²⁶ the LORD turn his face toward you
and give you peace.”

some good news...

I saw the hematologist yesterday and my white blood count levels are already improving. She said it was probably a result of an infection I had about 3 weeks ago, or the meds I took for it, or several other factors. I have to go back in a month just to make sure. (They did draw blood - 12 vials of it!) and the Dr. had the results before I saw her- she had even looked at it under the microscope and said it looked healthy)

John went with me and I am so glad he did. It was an unnerving place. It was beautiful and well organized and ran like clockwork. But it was just scary when you walk into a place named, "Cancer Care Center of South Texas." So many people were there for chemo, radiation, or such like that. A young lady (high school age) came in with her mom, she had short hair in places on her head where she still had hair, and they said they were there for radiation. The impact of that place was tremendous! Christmas decorations up and such life threatening treatments going on. I am so blessed with health that others are struggling with and have a positive attitude about. Why is it so easy to get "caught up" in our own triviality?

Yesterday, we got an email from our school nurse saying that we have a 4th grader at my school, and all he wants for Christmas is a Christmas tree. Thanks to some benefactors, they have been able to get a tree and lights, and asked for donated ornaments (one from each staff member) to go with the tree. Such simple things to make a child happy.

Is this what Christ was telling us? to come to him like a little child? We are the ones who make things so complicated. It doesn't have to be that way does it...

¹⁴ Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

Matthew 19:14 (New International Version, ©2010)

Thorough Explanation of Chelsea's mom's situation

Chelsea is my new daughter-in-law. She is married to Jon our youngest son. They were married in October and her mom, Janna and I hit it off right away. Janna is a vibrant and sweet lady and her pain is shared by all who care for her. I asked Chelsea if I could post this on my blog. It is such a good explanation of what is going on with her mom. It is rather lengthy, but worth the read. Please continue prayers on her behalf.

from Chelsea:

"My Mom, has been having several surgeries because of Idiopathic Scoliosis. That disease, is passed thru generations, usually skips one (grandma has it, then it goes to the grandchildren) in my family's case it was my mom's Grandma, then her, then me (the skipping generations did not occur). Also, of all the people who have scoliosis only 1 out of 7 are boys, the rest are girls (this is y i got it, and not my brothers). She had her first surgery in her early teens, and has had several several more (20+).

Over ten years ago, mom had surgery on vertebrae L1 (L stands for lumbar, meaning lower back). When she had this surgery done, one of her lungs was punctured and 2 of her ribs were broken of and taken out. (i thought it was so cool when i was young, because i could see her heart beat thru the hole where ribs were no longer there). I used to think that she had such a pure heart, that i could literally see her heart thru her skin!

Then, during the summer of this year, she had another surgery to fix a pinched nerve (vertebrae L3 and L4) that was causing her lots of pain. The surgery had apparently gone well, but a couple of days later, when she was not healing, and the doctors took the stitches out and the incision reopened, they discovered that she had a very bad infection. They took her into emergency surgery, scooped out all of the infected tissue, put a catheter thru her heart to pump antibiotics and after 3 months, it had seemed to gone away.

Now the problem is that,she went to the hospital because she could not take the pain any longer. Doctors took blood and found that the infection came back. To know more about the origin of the infection, they did something called a "Bone Gamaeotomy," which is dying all of her bones ~ the die is one color with healthy bone and another color with sick bones. They found that ALL (L1, L3, L4) vertebrae were infected. Looking back at her past history, they dont know if the infection started with the surgery of L1 and just now surfaced, or if it happened during her last surgery of L3-L4. The doctors don't know how to begin treating her because they dont know the origin of the infection.

Usually what would happen: The doctors operate again, take all of the plates and screws from any previous surgery, and leave the spine unstable (very painful~ no walking for several months, just bed rest).

the problem: her back is waaay too unstable, and while doing the surgery, they would have to puncture her lung to undo the L1 surgery, and take out completely vertebraes L3 and L4. Most likely she will die if this is done.

What is being done: she is being pumped with very potent antibiotics, trying to get her as strong as they can, to fly to the US and have surgery.

I hope that for everyone wondering what is going on, this is a good explanation. Please keep praying for her!!!!"

12 weeks!

30 pound mark attained today! Yay!

Update from Chelsea (daughter in law) about her mom, Janna.

"They did the bone biopsy ... similar to a spinal tap (very painful) It takes 4 days to get the results back."

Please continue prayers for pain relief, healing and wisdom.

Quote:

"There is divine purpose in bringing out the best in one another."

-Denis Waitley

news from Chelsea

this is a text from Chelsea late this afternoon.

"News!!! My mom was way too weak to undergo surgery, apparently it was cancelled and they put a catheter into her heart to give her antibiotics. Tomorrow the will take a piece of bone from her spine to check if the infection hasn't gotten to the bone there."

"They have to help her regain strength before they can do anything else."

Please continue to pray for healing and wisdom.

thank you,

Cheryl

From Chelsea (Jon's wife)

Chelsea says:

Pray for my Mommy!!!! Her infection is back and is having surgery at 4pm!! All the screws and plates that doctors had previously put in her back are now hurting her and creating incredible pain that is barely relieved by morphine. After they take them out, several months of bed rest are to come, probably no walking either. Her body is soo weak even b4 surgery that she is needing blood transfusions!!! PLEASE PRAY!

urgent prayer request

We just found out that my daughter-in-law, Chelsea's mom is having urgent surgery tomorrow to remove/replace the plates/screws in her spine due to a recurring infection. She has a history of multiple back surgeries and this one will be one of the most painful. They have asked for prayers and I am posting this to reach as many folks as possible. Her surgery is supposed to be at 4:00 pm and will last many hours.

Knowing that:

"The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." James 5:16

Thank you for your prayers and to God who will provide.

Thank you!

Thank you to those who have responded with a comment. I appreciate your encouragement.

Here is my favorite verse:

²⁰ Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, ²¹ to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

Ephesians 3: 20-21

Curiouser and Curiouser

For those who read my blog, I would love to know who you are. Leave a post for me and I won't publish it if you don't want me to. I am so curious when I see visitors from all over the country and I wonder if it is someone I know. Last week when we were in Abilene, one of the waitresses at Cracker Barrel (who knows Jon) came over to our table and introduced herself and said she reads my blog all the time! Also some of her family reads it. I was so touched that she wanted to meet me. I had no clue- there is a visitor from Dahlonega, Georgia that I would love to know who it is.

Anyway, if you feel comfortable just letting me know who you are in a post, I would love to satisfy my curiosity. Again, I won't allow it to be "seen" on my blog if you don't want me to.

Blessings,
Cheryl

Thursday Dec. 2: good news!

Today I went to my primary care Dr. and he had copies of the blood-work I had done earlier in the week.

Great news! He looked at them and said, "WOW! The bottom has dropped out of your cholesterol!

• It was 199 in June and now it is 126! woo-hoo!
• My triglycerides are 59 (reference is 55-200)
• HDL is 39 (reference is 35-95)
• LDL is 75.2 (reference is 35-95)
• Chol/HDL ratio is 3.2 (reference is 0-130) Risk factor is LOW (3.3 - 4.4)

WOW how is that for good news???

My iron, vitamins, and everything else is right in the normal to low-normal range.

Just had to share!

from Peggy's book:

"I believe that in each little thing created by God there is more than what is understood, even if it is a little ant."

-Teresa of Avila

Eleven Weeks!

2 1/2 months. One more pound, but many changes in how clothes fit. I am pleased.

I was having a conversation with a co-worker who had this surgery 11 years ago and we agreed that for folks who consider this surgery "the easy way out," they have NO clue. This is anything but easy. If it WAS easy, I wouldn't have needed to make the decision to have the surgery. It is difficult to explain to anyone who has never had a serious weight problem. It seems to be a perfectly logical situation, "put the fork down and walk away" is not as simple as that. As with most situations, please don't judge others when you don't know them, and then don't judge them anyway. :)

Eating: I have not had an "episode" (vomiting) for 3 weeks! YAY! I have had some serious nausea, but without the "violence" so that is a great step to acknowledge. I go back to see the surgeon on Friday and have some questions for him about meds and some eating questions.

If you know about the website, Simple Truths, there is a great little movie (less than 3 minutes) titled, "It's Not Just Me" it is written for women.

Here is the link: http://itsnotjustmemovie.com/ it is worth watching!

Quote (from Peggy's book):

"In what seems ordinary and everyday, there is always more that at first meets the eye."

-Charles Cummings

A Rare Occasion

Thanksgiving has always been a very special family time for the Rich (Sheerer) side of the family. It has been a family reunion for the past 54 years. This year we had between 50-60 folks during the day on Thursday. It has become a "community" effort more than ever over the past several years and this year was no exception. Many hands prepare favorite dishes that have become traditional and expected. Aunt Nona Sue's cheese grits are a must! Janice's green bean, corn, almond casserole is another. Two of the hash brown potato casseroles (one without onions) the special jello salads, and sliced turkey and ham with Grandma's cornbread dressing and giblet gravy I could go on and on!

One of our contributions is the tablecloth that everyone signs on Thanksgiving day and has chronicled our years since 1986. Last year we filled the last section and I added a wide border in order to continue this tradition. We also did a trivia game show last year using the tablecloth for verification of some of the answers! Fun!

The amazing thing this year, was that ALL of the Riches were present except Grandma Virginia (advanced Alzheimer's in respite care for these few days) and it was joyful! Usually a few are either too far away to come, or have family commitments on their "other side" of the family, but this year we were all there. We ranged in age from 85 (Grandpa Ken) to 6 months (baby Jaxon). I don't know when I have laughed so hard or "rolled my eyes" so much! That is family!

I am so very blessed to be a part of this amazing group. Each one has their own special place in the family. It was so touching, funny, happy, sad, irritating, annoying and wonderful. That is family!

At the end of the day, we love each other, and we claim each other. That's Family!

Now about eating:

• nibbling works
• bits of ham and turkey were fine
• green beans and green bean/corn casserole
• bits of cheese grits
• part of a roll

What doesn't work for me:

• cornbread dressing
• fresh veggies
• fruit

surprises:

• popcorn
• pretzels
• a bit of pumpkin pie (not the crust)

I took sugar free pudding, protein drinks, string cheese and protein bars. These were great for breakfasts or night snacks when I wasn't able to eat much for supper.

From Peggy's book:

"God always gives the best to those who leave the choice with Him."

-unknown

Thankful Wednesday!

Today is my first day of vacation! YAY!

I have today at home and then we go to Abilene for our annual family reunion with the Sheerer clan. It is my children's favorite holiday because they get to see most of their cousins and this family is close and wonderful.

I have soup to take for me, in case I have trouble eating. I also have protein shakes and bars to take. I will try the "nibble" technique first, but then if there are a problems I have my backup food.

I have gone down one more pound, but my body is "shifting" and it is interesting to put on clothes because there are surprises constantly. It is the fun part right now.

I am thankful for my many blessings, and wish everyone a thankful time during this season of gratitude.

from Peggy's book:

"Fill up the crevices of time with the things that matter most."

- Amy Carmichael

Blogging isn't for sissies!

Since Wednesday it has been an eventful few days.

On Friday I took my 4th grade study group to the courthouse for a tour. It was fabulous! Charlie (the bailiff) gave us an in depth look at our court and introduced us to several people including a court reporter who demonstrated how she records everything said in the courtroom on her machine. We agreed it was like learning a new language. The judge welcomed us and answered lots of questions. While we were in the courtroom, Charlie got a phone call from the Sheriff''s office across town. They wanted the kids to wave at them! They monitor the courtroom. Charlie also showed us a communication room where all of the security cameras were monitored.

After we got back, the sign installer for the playground signs (science vocabulary) arrived and Mr. Ivy (principal) and I walked the playground to show where each one would be placed. they should install them next week YAY!!!!

Then a teacher I met at TAGT came to see the Challenge Lab and she was sooooo excited about the possibilities for her program based on what she saw at 2 of our Challenge Labs.

Saturday, John and I spent 8-6 at a concealed handgun class, and shooting range. We Passed!!! It was very interesting most of the time......it was a lonnnnnnngggg class. I was so glad we had our 3 classes with a shooting instructor before we took the CHL class. It made me much more confident and I was pleased with my target results. It is really fun!

After the class, we met Jenny and Laura at the Palladium Imax to see Harry Potter and WOW what a movie! it was fun.

Eating continues to be trial and error. Things I can count on: Cream of Wheat for b'fast or protein bars/shakes. (NO to oatmeal, eggs or bacon) Soup for lunch: broccoli is great, split pea, or brothy vegetable also good (be careful of meat in soups sometimes yes much of the time no) Supper is a challenge.

Looking forward to church and a relaxing afternoon.

Quote from Peggy's book:

"The lives that have been the greatest blessing to you are the lives of those people who themselves were unaware of having been a blessing."

-Oswald Chambers

Weigh-in Wednesday

Ok, so only 1 pound, I will take it! I can tell that my body is changing. I have been lax about exercising and now I have new motivation. The way to get more weight off and change the shape more quickly is exercise. Is this a new revelation? of course not! just a re-newed motivation. When I get tired of the plateau this is the key.

I am still playing "catch-up" from being gone last week for TAGT and then being sick on Monday so school is "I'm dancing as fast as I can!" I barely got my assignments in this past week for grad school so now I feel like I am behind there too. ugh! This too shall pass.

Peggy's book:

"Happiness consists more in small conveniences or pleasures that occur every day, than in great pieces of good fortune that happen but seldom to a man in the course of his life."

-Benjamin Franklin

Surprise Sunday

This morning while I was getting ready for church I had a surprise- the black pants that I put on wouldn't stay up!!!! I had to re-think my whole outfit. :) My belt was too big a few days ago and now this! woo-hoo!

I need to back track a few days. TAGT conference was great! (mostly) I tried to eat some b-b-q chicken before our presentation on Thursday and it was a disaster! Pain, nausea and the inevitable "rejection by the body" made for an upsetting prelude to what was a good presentation. We had around 50 come to our session. There were lots of good questions and interest. I spent the rest of the afternoon resting in the hotel room. I was feeling better and Mark came by after work to take me to their house. I got to meet Jaxon and Aunt Christy (Tara's aunt) and have a short visit with them (Jessica stopped by for a minute too.) I was not "up to" going to dinner so Mark took me back to the hotel. I got some yogurt and fresh fruit at the coffee bar for dinner. I learned fast that the fresh fruit,while it tasted wonderful, did not agree with my new tummy. I was able to eat the yogurt with no problem. The next day I went to several great sessions and ate lunch with the team with no problems. (cream of broccoli soup, some tuna salad and rolls.)

So today I am celebrating the "surprise of the black pants!!" I am still on the learning curve and I am astonished at the things that work and those that don't.

Quote from Peggy's book:

"Every day holds the possibility of a miracle."

Ft. Worth is lovely this time of year!

I am in Ft. Worth for the Texas Association for Gifted and Talented education conference. We fondly call it the "tag-it" conference. My partners and I (we have an educational consulting company and we are all Challenge Lab teachers) are presenting at noon today on our favorite topic, the Challenge Lab.

Yesterday, I said that, "Things are still working and I will see results elsewhere than on the scale." Well, it is true! What a surprise when I put on my new pants and shirt (2 sizes down from when I started this journey) and the pants fit even better than 2 weeks ago when I bought them, and the belt I wore last week with these pants.......didn't have a hole small enough. I can put my fist between the belt and my body and that is on the smallest setting. What a great surprise!

When we finally got here, we went to Abuelo's to eat and I successfully navigated part of a cup of tortilla soup and some of their wonderful Espinaca (spinach) casserole (my favorite!) YAY!!!

This morning I am having sugar free cocoa, and a protein bar. I will go with my team to breakfast but won't try to eat. Then see what will happen for lunch....since we present at noon, it will be either a small snack ahead of time, or afterward.

What a fun day! I am looking forward to it.

Psalm 21 (NIV)

The king rejoices in your strength, LORD.

How great is his joy in the victories you give!

Plateau! & 8 Weeks

Looks like I am at a plateau this week. I have been here before and I know it is part of the process. Things are still working and I will see results elsewhere than on the scale.

Today I travel with my team (Challenge Lab Teachers) to Ft. Worth for the TAGT conference. It is the best professional development conference I have been to and I have gone for years! It is also the largest conference in the U.S. for gifted education. This year we are speaking again about the Challenge Lab in one of the breakout sessions. This is one of the highlights of my year.

I am taking my protein bars so I can "nibble" and not have any problems. We will see how this kind of traveling works with my new situation.

from Peggy's book:

"Life is what we are alive to.

It is not length but breadth....

Be alive to... goodness, kindness, purity,

love, history, poetry, music, flowers,

stars, God, and eternal hope."

-Maltbie D. Babcock

It is what it is!

I have enjoyed 5+ days without major episodes. The key for me is to nibble and not eat. It is the mindset I have to have to slow down enough to get the food in without triggering a negative response.

I forgot to take my vitamins with me to work and I was sooooo tired by the late afternoon! That will be a lesson learned.

Short post today but here is the quote:

"To be alive, to be able to see, to walk, to have a home . . . it's all a miracle.

-Arthur Rubinstein"

(from Peggy's book)

Memories of a Lifetime

What a lovely day we had with my in-laws yesterday. I am truly blessed to have married into a family that I love and loves me.

John's sister, Gail and her sweet hubby, John have a wonderful home filled with memories and have incorporated Ken and Virginia's lives into those memories since they combined households about 1 1/2 years ago. Virginia is in the advanced stage of Alzheimer's and is on hospice care.

They have her hospital bed in the family room and keep her in the midst of activity as much as possible.

Several friends came to the celebration yesterday and it was wonderful to see them interact with her. We took pictures, ate (mostly them, not me too much) and talked and visited. Gail had us all "circle up" and John (R.) prayed a blessing over this occasion of joy. Then we all sang the alma mater of Abilene Christian University (this is a powerful memory for Virginia, as she didn't know any lullabies and this is the song she sang to all of her babies) As we sang, Virginia sang along with us and didn't miss a beat! We sang another "church song" and again she sang right with us. John said, "Well, she may not know any of her sons, but she knows her God." Gail told several stories of Virginia's lucid moments since she has been with them and it was joyful. I am so thankful for Gail and John who generously devote their lives, home, time and energy to my sweet parents-in-law. Ken is in a wonderful home and able to stay with Virginia because of this arrangement. He is the epitome of unconditional love toward Virginia, never wavering from his devotion to her.

I am counting my blessings today and my heart is filled.

I took my own food for the weekend and then nibbled along at the appropriate times. The family (except for Virginia, Gail and John K.) went to eat lunch Saturday @ Cracker Barrel. I had a cup of vegetable soup, and some cornbread in it, nibbled on a biscuit too. It was all great- no pain, or "rejection" by my tummy. At the party, I nibbled a few pretzels. On the way home, I had my protein drink, and nibbled on some of John K.'s pickled okra (Yummy!) and it was all fine. I am thinking that this idea of "nibbling" is on the right track.

1 John 4: 7-8 (NIV)

^"7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. ⁸ Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love."

I will try to post some pictures here, later on.

Saturday in Houston

This morning we are in Houston preparing to celebrate Ken and Virginia Rich's 65th wedding anniversary.

What an example they are of unconditional and totally committed love for one another. We are expecting to see several family members this afternoon, and enjoy the company of this close knit loving group.

Are they (we) perfect? no, are we always in agreement? no- but we are a family who loves and supports each other.

I wonder about Jesus and His "family of disciples" when he walked among them. We know there were some quarrels, and discontent, even betrayal. HE chose them and they were not perfect. He knew they had faults and chose them anyway. He taught them by example. How can we learn from Jesus and His family? Unconditional and committed love is a choice. It is one we can make every hour of every day. It may look a little different to each of us, but the result is the same. We belong. One of the greatest needs that we share as humans, and as God's creations.

It is a beautiful day in Houston and we will make memories today that will warm our hearts for years to come. I am blessed by this family of mine.

My last two days have been wonderful in the eating department. I have been able to go slow, to nibble my way through meals and not rush. It has made a great improvement.

I hope you enjoy the blessings of this autumn Saturday and the extra hour we get to have tonight.

I Peter 2:15-17 (NIV)

" ¹⁵ For it is God’s will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish people. ¹⁶ Live as free people, but do not use your freedom as a cover-up for evil; live as God’s slaves. ¹⁷ Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor the emperor."

Surprises are good...

Last night, Jon and Chelsea dropped in unexpectedly- :)

It was great to see them. They brought another load of furniture, etc to the river house for storage until they move the end of Dec. to San Antonio.

They told some hilarious stories of their pets and I enjoyed their visit.

This week has been a challenge on all fronts. I am looking forward to a change of scenery this weekend. We will go to Houston for John's parents' 65 anniversary. I finally get to see the Keker-Rich home and have a visit with family.

I will renew my resolve to push through this barrier. It is a stage of the recovery and readjustment to my new "innards" so I will keep on track as best I can and will be glad on the other side of this process.

Isaiah 40:31 (New International Version)

³¹ but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

weigh-in wednesday

25 finally! wow.

So glad to make this milestone. Not much time today for writing so here is the bottom line.

Saw the Dr. yesterday and he adjusted my new meds. I am looking forward to feeling like my self soon. He repeated several times that this is part of the process of recovery. I know that in my head, but in my heart ----not so much. I was taking anti-depressants for 10+ years before the surgery and was so thankful to have relief from what was obviously a chemical imbalance. As with so much of this process I am scared that it won't work on some level.

If you have ever struggled with weight or depression you will understand the fear of trying something and it doesn't work. It is a mental battle for the most part, and though I know this new "tool"(gastric bypass) has to work, I have many more experiences of failure. That is what is strong in my mind and what I have to overcome.

It is much like faith- In my head (and my heart) I know that God is in control. I have many experiences that have proved his faithfulness to take care of me and my loved ones. I have full confidence in His providence.......until my impatience kicks-in. Then the doubts begin to slip into the cracks of my imperfect being. Those doubts are not from God. The strengthening of my faith comes from a conscious choice. Pushing away those doubts and releasing my control. Sure! That's an easy one! ha-ha. The need for certain chemicals to balance out my emotions complicates the whole picture. I have no reason to deny my need for this kind of help.

It is not a "sign of weakness" that my faith is weak. I believe and I can live in faith - as the scripture says God's grace is made perfect in weakness. God uses "weak" people to accomplish His purpose. If I am weak, then He can use me! So I will accept the help of medicine in order for God to accomplish His purpose for my life.

How can He use me if I am too afraid to live my life??? My struggles become my strengths. If I try to claim the credit for "being strong" then He can't be shared. It is not me but Christ who lives in me.

It is a paradox of Christianity that true strength is found in weakness. Jesus himself embodied the world's idea of weakness, even to the point of submitting to an excruciating death. However, just as Christ's saving power worked through that "weakness," so God's power is often most visible in the midst of suffering, humility, and weakness.

http://www.gospel.com/topics/when+i+am+weak

'Nuff said???

November is here!

What a great weekend we had.

Beautiful and Cold on Saturday morning and our first handgun lesson. It was way more fun and I had a blast! All of my shots hit the target where they were supposed to- (do I have to tell you we were only a couple of yards from it?) Any way, I need to work on strengthening my fingers so I can release the clip and cock the gun. It was so much fun to do.

After that, we stopped by Dillard's and I bought a couple of new things to wear at the state convention for gifted children where my team and I are presenting a session on the Challenge Lab. WOW I went down 2 sizes! woo-hoo! that was fun too.
Then home to a hair appointment. We (really my hairdresser) decided to change things up a bit. So I am now darker blond (really light brown if you ask me) and the shape has changed of the hair cut so it actually looks a little longer than when I first went in!!!!
Then went to dinner with several friends from church. What a great time we had being together and visiting. Eating was a challenge all weekend- but my friend, Donna made me a chicken breast plain and I tried some green beans w/ no problem.
Sunday was great with my little class (5 year olds) and then the service was good. I felt bad during the service and we came right home. I tried to eat, thinking it might help- WRONG!!!! After that episode, I slept for 1 1/2 hours. Then spent the rest of the day trying to get my graduate classwork done and turned in. ugh! I did "baby" my tummy the rest of the evening.
I started some liquid anti-depressant on Friday and I think it is helping some. I am not as emotional as I was last week. I am still not quite leveled out and go back to my primary care tomorrow to see what he thinks. I expect he may up the dose a bit this time.....until I get leveled out.
I am at school, because we have open house tonight and I will probably leave here around 7:15 or so, and then I plan to "crash" when I get home......
I am reading this book for my grad class that is very challenging to me... The title is "UNchristian" by David Kinnaman. it talks about how the younger generation (ages about 17-ish to about 29) need transparency from Christians and how they need to see us "keepin' it real" so I decided to just be open about my struggle with depression and how the medicine really makes a difference in my life. I don't see it as being "weak in my faith" because I am weak as a human. I see it as a way that God gives me grace to go on and live my life with a measure of courage.


As Paul says in 2 Corinthians 12:8-10 (NIV)
8) Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9) But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10) That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak then I am strong.

I can't say that I want to boast about my weaknesses, but hiding them doesn't do any good. I can say that God's grace will fill in the many cracks and faults that I have as I strive to live the life He wants for me.

Saturday - adventure time!

Today we embark on a new hobby (?) John wants to learn about handguns and be licensed. So this morning we will begin our classes. I will let you know how it goes. I am kind of excited- I love to learn new things.

So as I continue on this journey I am getting weary of not eating. When I eat protein bars/shakes I am fine though. I know it is still early on (only 6 weeks isn't very long after surgery) but I am impatient as usual.

So today I am filling the day with back to back scheduling of class, hair appointment, "dinner"with friends and grad work. Maybe that will be enough distraction????

I am choosing to make this a great day. (In spite of myself -lol)

1 Corinthians 4:7-8 (MSG)

"Isn't everything you have and eveything you are sheer gifts from God?"

6 Fridays

Have you ever thought about how the days of the week have personalities? Each day brings its own personality to my week. It is usually framed by scheduled events.

Monday:

A very mental day

Tuesday:

BUSY and demanding physically and mentally

Wednesday:

slower schedule, but usually a "meeting" day (deadlines for grad work)

Thursday:

a favorite!

Friday:

marathon day at school/ crunch day for grad work

Saturday:

day with John and "get 'er done" day

Sunday:

goes too fast!

Church / fellowship / catch up on spirit/ finish up on grad. work before a new unit opens.

Seems like the week flies by! Monday begins NOVEMBER!!! How did it get here so fast?

For Today:

"Seek goodness in others.

Love more persons more . . . .unselfishly,

without thought of return.

The return, never fear

will take care of itself."

-Henry Drummond

(from Peggy's little book)

A dip in the road

I was able to make a difference for someone yesterday!!!! YAY mission accomplished. Wonder if I can get in another one before the week is over?????

okay, so I am human! Instead of a bump in the road, I have encountered a "dip." It is just like those you encounter when driving in the beautiful hill country at a low-water-crossing when you come over the crest of a hill and your tummy does a flipflop as you quickly descend into the "dip." So here is what happened.

Spent 3 hours yesterday in doctors' offices. Good news all around, but I am "crashing" in the emotional area.

I knew that it was possible. After any major event (surgery, wedding, major medication changes,etc.) it is common to go thru a little depression. I was very alert to this since stopping my anti-depressant meds when they made me so sick. When I talked to my primary care doc he spent a lot of time with me talking about my worries and reassuring me that this is completely normal.

He prescribed a different Rx that is a liquid so maybe it won't bother my new tummy too much. I go back in a week for a follow up.

Now here is the real blessing: He called me at home last night to check on how I was doing!!!

I see how God puts "angels" to watch over me. I just have to look for them. I am so glad I called his office yesterday and went to the app't. and had a very "healing" conversation with this person who ministered to me. He talked about what I need to pray for (peace, strength, letting go and positive outcomes) what I need to acknowledge (a normal outcome of all of the major events) and to trust God to work out everything.

Thank you, Lord for putting my doctor in my life when I needed to "hear" the medicine as much as fill a prescription. Both are necessary for my spiritual and emotional health.

I am truly blessed beyond measure.

My "dip" is one reason I get to enjoy the scenic view when I get back up on the hilltop.

Praises to our creator for the "angels" He puts into our lives!

Here is my verse for the day:

Isaiah 58:8

Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.

Six Weeks and Counting...

Yes, it is finally getting past those first few weeks. I find myself "wishing" it was 3 months or 6 months down the road I am on, and then I realize I need to enjoy my days! No sense in "wishing" my life away. In so many ways this is my favorite time of the year:

• FALL!
• beautiful weather
• study groups are getting into the "good stuff"
• no projects due yet
• thankfulness
• anticipation (in a good way) of the holidays
• planning trips

My week has been full of challenges and I believe set myself up for them. I was (and am) trying to make someone's day better. I just didn't know how much work it was going to be to stay positive. I have been allowing negativity into my day(s) and find that the very thing I rail against, later that day I will be doing myself. Shocking!

Even Paul struggled with this and I am sure it is not from God!

Here are several versions of what Paul said about it in Romans 7:15

New International Version (©1984) I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. New Living Translation (©2007) I don't really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don't do it. Instead, I do what I hate. English Standard Version (©2001) For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. New American Standard Bible (©1995) For what I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate. International Standard Version (©2008) I don't understand what I am doing. For I don't practice what I want to do, but instead do what I hate. GOD'S WORD® Translation (©1995) I don't realize what I'm doing. I don't do what I want to do. Instead, I do what I hate.

I am thinking that Satan is laughing at my feeble efforts, but I am here to tell the negative forces that my God is bigger and greater than anything they have! I am aware of my faults and I can tap into the power of the creator to guide me to the person I can help today. Even if it is me.

Join me in the battle over evil forces- those daily "stealers of joy" and let's choose to make it a good day today!